Life 100 years in the future, Moscow style

http://englishrussia.com/?p=656

Skiing in Dubai

This is SO cool. In Dubai they have an indoor skiing place built on to their very large Mall (should have noted the name.) This is just a picture that I liked of one end, where the buildings are, everything looks so real, doesn't it? I am looking for a nice video to link here, so you can see the skiing end. Pity you have to go to Saudi Arabia to see this

There are not many women my age who get a few months of teenager hood back, even if I might have seemed crazy at the time. My 40's were my worst decade. My father passed away in 1992.DH and I were not getting along too well. (Well we still don't see eye to eye but besides the odd dig here and there we get along as well as we might for me being 52 and he, 67.)I had no problems with my 30's because I closed my eyes to a lot of things, trying to be a person that I wasn't. My daughter was a teenager and this caused me to look back and compare her teenagerhood with the one I spent

from "Fumbling Towards Ecstasy"

POSESSION

Listen as the wind blows from across the great divide
voices trapped in yearning, memories trapped in time
the night is my companion, and solitude my guide
would I spend forever here and not be satisfied?
and I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
and after, I'd wipe away the tears
just close your eyes dear
Through this world I've stumbled
so many times betrayed
trying to find an honest word to find
the truth enslaved
oh you speak to me in riddles
and you speak to me in rhymes
my body aches to breathe your breath
your words keep me alive
And I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
and after, I'd wipe away the tears
just close your eyes dear
Into this night I wander
it's morning that I dread
another day of knowing of
the path I fear to tread
oh into the sea of waking dreams
I follow without pride
nothing stands between us here
and I won't be denied
and I would be the one
to hold you down
kiss you so hard
I'll take your breath away
and after, I'd wipe away the tears
just close your eyes...

Sarah Mclachlan

BABY I LOVE YOUR WAY.....Peter Frampton

Shadows grow so long before my eyes
And they're moving across the page
Suddenly the day turns into night
Far away from the city
But don't hesitate 'cuz your love won't wait
Ooh baby I love your way (everyday)
Wanna tell you I love your way
Wanna be with you night and day
Moon appears to shine and light the sky
With the help of some fireflies
I wonder how they have the power to shine, shine, shine
I can see them under the pine
But don't hesitate'cuz your love won't wait
Ooh baby I love your way (everyday)
Wanna tell you I love your way
Wanna be with you night and day
But don't hesitate'cuz your love won't wait
I can see the sunset in your eyes
Brown and grey and blue besides
Clouds are stalking islands in the sun
I wish I could buy one out of season
But don't hesitate'cuz your love won't wait
Ooh baby I love your way (everyday)
Wanna tell you I love your way
Wanna be with you night and day
Ooh baby I love your way (everyday)
Wanna tell you I love your way
Wanna be with you night and day

Bridge Over Troubled Water........my song

Everybody has a song that defines their life at a certain stage. My song was "Bridge Over Troubled Water". It describes how lonely my life was, and how much I wished I had a good friend at my back, just like it says in the song. Of course, when I became moonstruck by Wayne (my four year crush), in my mind he became the one "sailing right behind", ie at my back.

Back in the day, we had records, both long-playing and 45's. Everybody had a ton of 45's (small records with a song on either side). My first LP was BOTW. I heard the song on the radio and decided it spoke to me. When I got some money I went out and bought it. Well, when my mother and father went out at night for a function (not very often) I would put this record on the stereo and play it. This was a big thing because NOBODY was supposed to use the stereo, not even my mother.

So there I was, in the dark in the living room, sitting in the window and staring out into the night. It was the month of May so the night air was full of the fragrant, earthy smells of growing things. These kinds of pre-summer nights still make me feel like going out into the darkness even tho I have no idea of where I would go. And in the background I would play this record over and over. The songs are etched in my mind, especially Bridge Over Troubled Water. Even just setting this down seems to take me back to those days when anything was possible, and I could make things happen. Tomorrow would be the day he would speak to me. Tomorrow he would take away all my fears and longings. Tomorrow was another day.

BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED WATER

When youre weary, feeling small

When tears are in your eyes

I will dry them all

Im on your side, when times get rough

And friends just cant be found,

Like a bridge over troubled water,I will lay me down

Like a bridge over troubled water,I will lay me down

When youre down and out

When youre on the street

When evening falls so hard

I will comfort you

Ill take your part

When darkness comes

And pain is all around,

Like a bridge over troubled water,I will lay me down

Like a bridge over troubled water,I will lay me down

Sail on silvergirl, Sail on by

Your time has come to shine

All your dreams are on their way

See how they shine

If you need a friend

Im sailing right behind

Like a bridge over troubled water,I will ease your mind

Like a bridge over troubled water, I will ease your mind

Simon and Garfunkle, "Bridge Over Troubled Water", 1969

My 4 Year Crush

I revived this blog hoping to work thru some things when I was a teenager. This picture was sent to me by the lady on the right. I am next to her. I guess I was 13 or 14 at the time. Next to me is the kid I had a crush on for 4 years of my life. I don't remember the girl on the left who was trying to drag him off. I think I remember the girl in back of her and the two behind me, I know. I can't see the one behind my crush so I don't know who they are.

I first saw this kid at high school and I wish I could remember when exactly it was that I knew this person was stuck in my head and would take years to leave. He was a year ahead of me and I think he took me for someone else, a person called Elizabeth DaCosta. From what I gather this was a mousy person afraid of her own shadow. He even called me "Elizabeth."

I imagine I will have to set up some scenery here so you see where I am. I was 13, in my first year of high school. I rode the bus to school, and while I didn't know it then, I rode by his house every day. It was high on a hill and I used to look at it everyday, hoping to see him outside. (yes, I had it very, very bad.)

Like every 13 year old, I was full of misgivings, self-doubt and very little self-esteem. I am 52 years old and none of that has changed, except that I am old, fat and been thru the wringer of life. Back then, as you can see, I was young, thin and had long hair but like all teenagers I didn't appreciate it until it was gone. I had a terrible complexion, made worse by an extreme case of chicken pox which left me marked all over, worst of all, on my face. This and the terrible acne made my life very miserable. Someone started calling me "Speckled Hind" and all that first year I got called that. The boys used to pick on me all the time and I felt very ugly and very unworthy. It used to hurt most of all that two boys that I had known thru elementary school teased me the worst. One of these I had had a little crush on back then, if you could call it a crush when kids are little.

So let's just say I "noticed" him. The last time I went home for a visit, about 6 years ago, he sat next to me on the bus and we talked a little. So much water under the bridge. Childhood was so very far away.

I think I will stop here in this post because I don't want to make it too long. I will return to it another time.

Changed the template!

Hopefully this makes this blog easier to read. The print on the original was just too small to read. Blogger has premade templates that you can switch to. I am glad to get rid of the other one. Maybe when I feel like messing around with it I can add stuff and make it pretty. But my main blog is the DF one and I can make that one as pretty as I want to. Also there are only two links to this one: DF and in my favourites. I like it better that way

reviving this blog

I was thinking of ways to write some different stuff in my DF blog, stuff that wasn't really linked to my depression. I thought about some private entries, or perhaps making a whole new Blogspot blog. Then I thought, I already have a blog for this kind of thing. So after 1am I decided to link this blog to DF's blog and this would give me another place for other thoughts. So here it is. I have some "schoolgirl poetry" I wrote 10 years ago, in answer to something I was going thru at the time. Then there are some songs that meant things to me, and some still do. I am very grateful for these few years that allowed me to live in a "dreamworld". Life sux most of the time now. But at least I can look back. Maybe that's what this blog is about.

PRELUDE - After the Goldrush

This was a song I heard in the early 70's when I wished a flying saucer would come and take me away from here. Or at least Scotty would beam me up or something..either way I loved this song

AFTER THE GOLDRUSH

Well I dreamed I saw the knights in armour coming saying something about a queen
There were peasants singing and drummers drumming and the archer split the tree
There was a fanfare blowing to the sun that was floating on the breeze
Look at Mother Nature on the run in the nineteen-seventies
I was lying in a burned-out basement with a full moon in my eyes
I was hoping for a replacement when the sun burst thru the skies
There was a band playing in my head and I felt like getting high
Thinking about what a fried had said, I was hoping it was a lie
Well I dreamed I saw the silver spaceships flying in the yellow haze of the sun
There were children crying and colours flying all around the chosen one
All in a dream, all in a dream, the loading had begun
They were flying Mother Nature's silver seed to a new home in the sun
Flying Mother Nature's silver seed to a new home in the sun

Something I would like to do

I have been thinking and wondering how I could draw a few things and have them published on my blog, like design my own avatar and stuff like that. Wonder how I could get what I draw on a piece of paper onto a computer screen. Maybe Chris would know. I don't mean anything fancy or stuff like that. Like if the mood strikes me, it would be nice to draw my own picture for a post instead of other peoples'

The first book of this series,Wheel of Time

This is the book cover I like the best, where it shows Moiraine Sedai and her Warder, Lan (al'Lan Mandragoran, Uncrowned King of Malkier)

The Wheel Of Time..Robert Jordan

About 10 years ago, I began reading a huge fantasy series by Robert Jordan, called "The Wheel of Time". It started off with "The Eye of the World" and carried on to about 10 or more books. Each of these were very long, 700 pages or so . I was so wrapped up in this series that as soon as a new book would come out, I'd be calling Barnes and Noble to hold me a hard-cover soon as they got any.

The woman in this picture is my favourite character form the series. She is Moiraine Damodred , an Aes Sedai of the Blue Ajah. In this picture she is in the White Tower, where Aes Sedai are trained and live, unless they have business to take care of in the world. I won't get into any more detail. Suffice to say,The Wheel Of Time has many web sites covering every aspect of this series, all it's characters and illustrations drawn by fans. This picture is one I stole off one of these sites (so sue me). I belong to an Aes Sedai fanlisting myself, and of course I picked the Blue Ajah. I was very wrapped up in these books and was able to live in a fantasy world peopled by the characters.

I wish I could still escape from myself like this. I can't concentrate long enough to get thru these long books. I believe I have 3 more to read before the end. And as for the fantasy world, well lets just say the escapism door is shut to me at the moment. I wish it would open again

"Fortress of Solitude", stolen from Elfland for Babs,he he

More Cheshire Cat (and Alice!)

Cheshire cats

Two more Cheshire cats. I always had a thing about Alice in Wonderland but as a cat person The Cheshire Cat was my favourite character.

The Cat on the right ised to "fade away into a grin" but maybe I need to re-copy him over....

Flying Dreams

Isn't this a beautiful picture....they have a web site where people 's dreams are recorded and I found this beautiful illustration that someone created. The picture is much bigger but I think I did real well to get this much transferred . The ability to fly has always been a wish of mine since I can remember